culuyetille: (parker/hardison)
[personal profile] culuyetille
Finally a fandom-related post! :)

Recently I've hit the jackpot of Parker/Alec/Eliot fanfics: the OT3 tag at Archive of Our Own. Reading so many wonderful fanfics there motivated me to activate my own account, and I intend to repost everything I've ever written at AO3 under the many aliases I've used over my 12 years in fandom. Or as much of it as I can find online, given the many HD crashes and utter failure at making back-ups...


I can't thank [personal profile] irrlicht enough for introducing me to Leverage, because on top of being a brilliant show, it stirred my writing muses back to life. I can't express how much I'd missed the feeling of needing to write else I'd burst with the ideas, voices and plots. It's like a part of me that'd been numb for a very long while has suddenly recovered sensitivity, and I can experience the world properly again. *beams*

Without further ado, my newest fic!

Title: On our way to Saturn or Spotless communication (read it at AO3)
Author: [personal profile] culuyetille
Rating: T
Pairing: Parker/Alec/Eliot
Summary: It took Parker two very detailed invitations to get them where they are now.
A/N: ‘Elise’ is my name for Sophie until canon says differently. This is unbeta'ed, all mistakes are on me.
Disclaimer: Don’t own Leverage, am not making any money from this.

Yes, it was about the sex. But also about dragging Alec along in Parker and Eliot’s morning jog.

And also about strictly forbidding Parker to cook them one of her “breakfasts” ever again

Also, about Alec and Parker spending all afternoon working on mechatronic improvements of her free-falling devices and, at Eliot’s growled “Guys!”, replying:

“Okay, we’re sorry we did this without you and on the kitchen table.”

Then, at Eliot’s puzzled eyebrow, “It’s a very distinctive growl, Eliot.”

* * * * *

It’d been a slow transition from “the hacker” to “my Alec” in Parker’s internal classification system. The intermediate “Hardison” phase had lasted the longest, with the substages “not trying to harm me”, “okay to touch me without forewarning” and “pretzels”. The transitional phase between “pretzels” and “a thing” had been particularly troubling for her.

So it was that, one day, she squared her shoulders, walked up to Alec Hardison and had the kindness (Elise would be so proud!) of waiting for him to finish pouring himself orange soda before casually blurting, “So, I was thinking we should just have sex already.”

From the corner of her eye she saw Eliot duck back into the bathroom he’d just stepped out from. Weird. Had he forgotten to wash his hands? Ew.

Her attention was drawn back to her unusual heart rate and Hardison’s impossibly widened eyes.

“Wha-” He drew in a breath and spread his arms in the placating way he used to explain to her things non-broken people knew. “Look, mama, I’m really, really not saying ‘no’, but. What’s going on?”

* *

He watched Parker furrow her brow the way she did when trying to translate her reasoning to non-Parker folk, then sigh in exasperation.

“Because I don’t know how to talk right…” her face relaxed and she looked at him hopefully, “about pretzels.”

He couldn’t help grinning like the fool he was as he placed his hands on her shoulders.

* *

“Baby girl, you did great. How about we agree on the sex, and before or after you let me take you out to do something you like?”

“Like a bank? Or banana pancakes?”

He chuckled.

“More like banana pancakes, but either one’s good.” His eyes were soft like the time she’d thanked him for getting her through Steranko safely. “I’m gonna kiss you now, okay?”

* *

“Sure.” Her smile was already an epic win on Alec’s record, so he came damn close to a heart attack when she added, “I like your kisses.”

* *

Trapped by courtesy inside the loo while his friends fucking finally kissed, Eliot internally debated for the umpteenth time whether they were the best or the worst thing that’d ever happened to one another.

On one hand, it was jackpot for Parker, finding a man who adored her quirks at least as much as he appreciated her beauty; and for Hardison, having someone to drag him from his comfort zone into all he could be.

On the other hand, they were already crazy enough on their own and, despite popular disregard for hitters’ intellectual prowess, Eliot well knew that the fusion bomb was the most powerful destructive force.

He’d been musing on the subject for years now, so it came as a small surprise that he was hard.

* * * * *

A few weeks after his thing for Parker became a thing with Parker, they both agreed Eliot must have been avoiding them.

Alec’s preliminary calculations indicated an abnormal absence at 61% of their usual movies, matches, beer, dinners, gaming and other manner of hanging out sessions.

Parker was restless on the suddenly ginormous couch.

Therefore, at Eliot’s next refusal – of WCW’s semi-finals! Parker pouted at the failure of their trap – Alec frowned.

“Fine, man. Go do your thing. But just,” he gestured in frustration, “look, things are different but you’re still my man, okay? And I sure could use some counter-sparring sessions.” He brushed his knuckles against Parker’s upper arm while she none too subtly mouthed ‘cry baby’ to their friend.

Eliot’s eyes went uncertainly from one of them to the other, then he huffed in satisfaction. Parker was beaming.

“And maple banana pancakes for me!”

Eliot rolled his eyes but his lips were twitching upwards as he declared, “Noted.”

“So, we good on Invasion tomorrow night? Can I call her?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be there.”

Invasion was their game: a famous heist was randomly selected, then each player had 45 minutes to come up with a plan. Everybody judged everybody’s and the most efficient one (considering time, cost and effort) got out of doing the dishes or, in Eliot’s case, got treated to dinner. Elise had been appointed their official heist picker because the other two refused to trust code that Hardison had as much as suggested, and both Parker and Eliot could count shuffled paper like nobody’s business.

* * * * *

In retrospect, Alec knew he should’ve been wary of Parker’s loony beaming. It’d always meant trouble. Although he couldn’t help the excitement shivering down his pants.

He was pretty sure she’d caught him casually checking out Eliot’s backside as their friend rose to get them more beer, and past experience had taught Alec that possessive Parker meant being bossed around during awesome angry sex. He was, therefore, caught totally off guard when, right after saying a high-pitched “Bye!” to Eliot, his girlfriend jumped him in glee.

“Oh, that’s great, Alec!”

“What’s great, baby?” He treaded cautiously.

“That you like him too.”

Before he could recover, she’d pulled back, looking thoughtful.

“We may need a bigger bed…”

“Whoa. Slow down, mama.”

Alec’s heart was racing wildly. He put Parker down and spread his hands placatingly.

“Let me handle this, okay?”

“But it took you years to talk to me.” She pouted. “And you never even did! I was the one who-”

He silenced her with a stern look.

“Promise.” After an instant of trying to stare each other down, he sighed and reached out to touch her upper arm. “I’ll make it happen, baby girl.”

She crossed her arms sullenly.

“Fine. Promise.” Then the loony beaming was back. “Okay, now I want anticipation sex.”

Before he could reply she’d taken off her shirt. As often happened, Alec just grinned and went with it. He was becoming a Zen Jedi Master on the naked Parker department.

* * * * *

Parker was proud to see her McGyverishness rubbing off on her Alec.

They’d just finished a job and were packing up to return home. She watched Alec wisely wait for Eliot to lock up his blades before cleaning his throat.

“So, Eliot.”


The hitter’s sudden alertness let on that he’d picked up on her Alec’s nervous attempt at smoothness. She “tied her shoes” to stifle a grin.

“After we get back and get some rest and all, d’you wanna come over?”

“Sure?” Eliot was puzzled.

Parker placed herself next to Alec, who had on his wavering reassuring smile that also meant he was ready to duck stuff thrown at him.

“And stay over?”

She watched Eliot’s eyes move intensely between them, focusing on Alec’s neck and counting his pulse. She grabbed Alec’s hand and smiled the non-threatening smile Elise had coached her into.

Eliot smirked and nodded. She looked from one man to the other and decided to be helpful.

“He means for sex. With us.”

She was puzzled at the murderous look Alec gave her. What? Eliot was chuckling, so all was good, right? Indignant, she shoved Alec.

“Go, kiss him!”

She winked and gave Eliot thumbs up to convey her high opinion of her Alec’s kissing skills.

* *

Alec glared at his girlfriend just a little before focusing his attention on the intense, overwhelmingly attractive man before him. Eliot’s blue eyes were twinkling amusedly, daring him. Well, he wasn’t ashamed of being bossed around by Parker (seriously, have you met her?), but he’d be damned if he didn’t curt-circuit Eliot’s smug little smirk. He was a damn fine kisser.

He locked eyes with the shorter man just before leaning in and, at the last moment, softening up just the smallest bit. He could feel Eliot thinking ‘damnit, Hardison’ as he lunged to clash lips with his, loud and forceful and Eliot Spencer, then Alec ran the tip of his tongue over the other man’s lower lip and gained entrance to his new realm. Feeling Eliot relax against him, he couldn’t help a small smug smile of his own.

A small arm around his waist and Eliot’s muffled grunting told him Parker had joined them, and was currently busying herself licking up the side of the other man’s neck.

* * * * *

Eliot had never thought it would actually happen. Well, he’d thought a fair amount about it happening, but had never assumed they would be sober. Or that there’d be an actual invitation by Alec, and hilarious clarification from Parker.

Or that it would be this good, he mused, lazily drowsing through his lovers’ conversation.

“You happy, mama?”


“Me too. And I reckon Mr. Growly here just did very well for himself, too.”

* * * * *


Date: 2011-09-07 11:35 pm (UTC)
irrlicht: (X-Men 1st Class Charles + Erik 01)
From: [personal profile] irrlicht
You are so very welcome, darling, and YAAAAAAY for you writing again!!! *bounces* I'm deeply sorry that I don't read Parker/Alec/Eliot, but for some reason it's "just" gen fic for me when it comes to Leverage.

Anyway. I'm happy you found your muse again. It was the same for me with the lovely boys in my icon. ;)


Date: 2011-09-08 09:42 am (UTC)
irrlicht: (SN Castiel: Badge)
From: [personal profile] irrlicht

Yes, but still. Erm... I'm sure I can send you some. At least three, that come to mind immediately, but they're short ones. In any case I'm not exactly reading MUCH Leverage fanfiction. Mostly because it's a lot of Eliot/Hardison, Eliot/Parker/Hardison and Eliot/Parker. I don't have the time and patience to actually search for gen fics. But like I said, I have a few. :)

Thank you so much, love! *HUGS* I only have one fic (so far) and it's a pretty short one. AND it's Charles/Erik. (Very tame, but still.) So, please, only read my fic, if you like the pairing. Don't feel obligated in any way. *hugs again*


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May 2012

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